I couldn't say it better if I tried.

I read  Meanqueen's blog this morning as I do whenever she posts. Illona is an inspirational lady who I've had the pleasure to meet. Here is the link to her blog this morning. Go read, it's brilliant.

http://meanqueen-lifeaftermoney.blogspot.com/2011/03/it-is-fair.html

Good grief! I almost spent some money!

Reminding myself that I have to keep a grip! I used to have fat days and thin days, now I just have fat days and sexy days. It'll have to do. I almost lost my grip today and looked else where for an answer. I bought a local paper (first waste of money and I mustn't do it again!) Secondly I read the rubbish and thirdly I reacted to an advert and contacted a health and fitness club and almost thought of going! It would have cost me £5.80 a week and I would have used it as a crutch for my own lack of will power. I have to sort out will power myself. I have it and I know when I use it, things go right, for example, I'm paying back debts. Weight loss is the same. I have all the old 'diet club' advice, I followed it before and I lost three stone. Going to the class did not make me lose the weight, I did! I need to sort out the rest of my self control. I need to follow the programme I did before and just stick to it!

Well, I am doing just that and it's left me feeling that stupid guilt that I feel about money, by huge weight gain and not doing things for myself. Only I have the answer.

It's amazing what blogs can do to remind you that you have the answers yourself! Firstly, I read Ilona's blog at 'Life after money '. I've met Ilona, she stayed with us last summer and she says it, lives and reaps the rewards of her frugal life. She travels, raises money for an animal charity, rambles, walks miles in the peace of her own company and is an all round positive person. Her blog today, reminded me, that it isn't easy and that self discipline has its own rewards and they are sometimes delayed and they are never instant. Saving a few pennies here, there and anywhere will eventually pay off my debts.

I then read the fantastic blog Mennonite Girls can cook and their Sunday message of 'bread for the journey'. There was the message I needed today and it said -
Hebrews 12:11 NIV

" No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have trained by it." No recipe today, but certainly the nutrition I needed today.

My harvest and my peace will come, it's in the distance and there's a slow journey. I just need to make sure it's a low calorie portion controlled one, which is also low in cost and can be batch cooked to make sure when I get there, I'm not dragging myself there but springing energetically!

I'm not alone, there are plenty of people like me.

I have been looking, as I often do, at Frugal Websites. I do this when I feel as if I'm doing what I do when no one elses bothers. I feel a bit isolated at the moment because, in a management meeting at school, they were discussing rewards for students and mentioned a chain of restaurants,where the reward was a family voucher, so the winning student could take their family for supper. I had never heard of it. It was then I realised how far out of the social loop I am, as I haven't eaten out since 2008, when I went cold turkey and stopped spending money.

Every now and then, I miss money. Once, if I needed clothes, I went to a shop and bought them. Now, I have to scour eBay and charity shops and keep a constant eye open. I can't buy what I need when I need it, but have to pre-empt that if I see something in my size. If I see a pair of long legged size 16 jeans, I buy them! If I see something smart for work. I buy it. If something comes up on Freecycle that I could need, then I ask for it and sometimes get it. I now have a £20 a month budget for shoes and all clothing...........and I stick to it.

Today, I was reading various posts and articles on the Economides family website, that you can visit by clicking here . I do a lot of the things they do:

I stock take at home every week - I don't buy what I already have
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I  stock up if something is stupidly cheap and it will keep. Loo rolls, soap powder, shampoo or pet food.

I only buy what's on the list and I only shop with a debit card.

I menu plan and shop for the menu, including packed lunches, snacks and drinks

I take a flask with me when we go out - there is no way  I will pay for a coffee/.

I never carry cash and I leave my debit card at home - I can not impulse buy.

If I go charity shopping, I allow myself £10 and I allow myself to do this once a fortnight.

I bulk cook and freeze meals.

I ration diesel and use of my car to make what fuel I have last a week.

I use freecycle to give things away and sometimes to get things.

I ask the school canteen if I can recycle their plastic containers for plant pots or to use in the home (cat litter, dog biscuits, a bin in each room).

Their website was brilliant and I enjoyed reading it. I am not alone, and I wish I had always lived this way. I soon found out who my friends were when I couldn't any longer take part in activities that cost money as I now don't have any. The real friends are just that and have stuck with me.