Things That Make You Go Hmm...: Margrethe the Birthday Girl

A few days ago, Queen Margrethe celebrated her birthday, and I thought it was a rousing fashion success.

Strong color, good fit. Total win for the 71-year-old birthday girl.

She must have agreed, because she brought it out again yesterday. And she added a few things...

World's largest neck bow? Letizia and Mette-Marit have nothing on this Queen's scarves.

Oh, and she added a hat. No, excuse me, an upturned oil funnel.

Or maybe it's a leftover party hat? A blueberry straight off the vine? The receptor for her alien sartorial communications? Oh, Marge.

This is not so much a hmm... as it is a ha! I ask you: how can you not love her? She's always good for a chuckle, so darn cheerful in her crazy clothing concoctions. Would that we were all so utterly unselfconscious! May she have many happy, nuttily attired returns.


Photos: stiften.dk

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: Margrethe the Birthday Girl

A few days ago, Queen Margrethe celebrated her birthday, and I thought it was a rousing fashion success.

Strong color, good fit. Total win for the 71-year-old birthday girl.

She must have agreed, because she brought it out again yesterday. And she added a few things...

World's largest neck bow? Letizia and Mette-Marit have nothing on this Queen's scarves.

Oh, and she added a hat. No, excuse me, an upturned oil funnel.

Or maybe it's a leftover party hat? A blueberry straight off the vine? The receptor for her alien sartorial communications? Oh, Marge.

This is not so much a hmm... as it is a ha! I ask you: how can you not love her? She's always good for a chuckle, so darn cheerful in her crazy clothing concoctions. Would that we were all so utterly unselfconscious! May she have many happy, nuttily attired returns.


Photos: stiften.dk

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: Is it April 29th yet?

Well, I think it's time for April 29th to get here, because things are starting to get a little weird.

When you've reached the point where you can grab your William and Kate beer out of your William and Kate refrigerator with your William and Kate manicured hand, while wearing your William and Kate shoes...

...it may be time to move on. Clearly the souvenir people have had a little too much time to think about this.

Though maybe some of them could stand to put a little more thought into it. Hmm...

Actually, the Harry and Kate mug is worth a purchase. I could sip from it while dining on my new china:

(I may be one of the aforementioned people that should really move on for best mental health.)

Yeah, it's time for April 29th to get here. The souvenirs are out of control, and the media is clearly out of things to talk about.

We're with you, Kate. These "headlines" make us all a little more haggard. Good thing for you you're still the third most attractive royal, according to a nifty little piece of journalism brought to my attention by reader Susan, who must have sensed in her infinite wisdom that I was about to write this post.

When we reach the point where we're comparing the beauty of Princess Grace to Princess Fiona of Shrek (not kidding), it's time to stop.

Too bad April 29th won't whisk all of our problems away. I just...you guys...I can't.

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: Is it April 29th yet?

Well, I think it's time for April 29th to get here, because things are starting to get a little weird.

When you've reached the point where you can grab your William and Kate beer out of your William and Kate refrigerator with your William and Kate manicured hand, while wearing your William and Kate shoes...

...it may be time to move on. Clearly the souvenir people have had a little too much time to think about this.

Though maybe some of them could stand to put a little more thought into it. Hmm...

Actually, the Harry and Kate mug is worth a purchase. I could sip from it while dining on my new china:

(I may be one of the aforementioned people that should really move on for best mental health.)

Yeah, it's time for April 29th to get here. The souvenirs are out of control, and the media is clearly out of things to talk about.

We're with you, Kate. These "headlines" make us all a little more haggard. Good thing for you you're still the third most attractive royal, according to a nifty little piece of journalism brought to my attention by reader Susan, who must have sensed in her infinite wisdom that I was about to write this post.

When we reach the point where we're comparing the beauty of Princess Grace to Princess Fiona of Shrek (not kidding), it's time to stop.

Too bad April 29th won't whisk all of our problems away. I just...you guys...I can't.

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: Elena, Again

Princess Elena (a.k.a. Infanta Elena, if you're feeling proper) is at it again, with the weird suits. I just thought you should know.

You know what this is? It's a sartorial Rorschach test. She's presented us with some blobs of ink, on fabric instead of paper, and now we have to determine what we see.

I see...the remnants of a 1991 garage sale in Arizona...a tie-dye bra experiment gone wrong...an amateur fashion critic grateful that this one doesn't come with matching trousers...and a lovely princess with a fantastic figure that's completely hidden beneath an egregiously loud print.

What do you see, hmm?

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: Elena, Again

Princess Elena (a.k.a. Infanta Elena, if you're feeling proper) is at it again, with the weird suits. I just thought you should know.

You know what this is? It's a sartorial Rorschach test. She's presented us with some blobs of ink, on fabric instead of paper, and now we have to determine what we see.

I see...the remnants of a 1991 garage sale in Arizona...a tie-dye bra experiment gone wrong...an amateur fashion critic grateful that this one doesn't come with matching trousers...and a lovely princess with a fantastic figure that's completely hidden beneath an egregiously loud print.

What do you see, hmm?

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: The Prince's Shoes

William and Kate were out for lunch on Sunday, and for once, her outfit isn't the one I want to talk about.

Can we discuss the Prince's shoes, please? Lunch at an upscale club in trainers straight off the football pitch. (Did I say that right? Is "pitch" right? I don't follow the volleyball.) Thing is, this isn't the first time he's done this to what would otherwise be a perfectly acceptable outfit.

Here we have him leaving a club, all casual and cool. I'd even call this one of his more attractive appearances, except:

See, now I just want to take a shower. And it appears to be a family affair:

Boys, boys, boys. As a Shoe Person, this pains me. And it's gotta pain Prince Charles too, right? I mean, that man's so well-groomed his pajamas are probably bespoke.

Anybody else bothered here? Or am I the only one with a shoe concern that extends this far? (Probably.)

Photos: Big Pictures/Matrix Photos/Daily Mail/Diedda Bushell/XclusivePix.com

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: The Prince's Shoes

William and Kate were out for lunch on Sunday, and for once, her outfit isn't the one I want to talk about.

Can we discuss the Prince's shoes, please? Lunch at an upscale club in trainers straight off the football pitch. (Did I say that right? Is "pitch" right? I don't follow the volleyball.) Thing is, this isn't the first time he's done this to what would otherwise be a perfectly acceptable outfit.

Here we have him leaving a club, all casual and cool. I'd even call this one of his more attractive appearances, except:

See, now I just want to take a shower. And it appears to be a family affair:

Boys, boys, boys. As a Shoe Person, this pains me. And it's gotta pain Prince Charles too, right? I mean, that man's so well-groomed his pajamas are probably bespoke.

Anybody else bothered here? Or am I the only one with a shoe concern that extends this far? (Probably.)

Photos: Big Pictures/Matrix Photos/Daily Mail/Diedda Bushell/XclusivePix.com

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: Letizia's Safety Pin

Let the gala dinners for 2011 begin! The President of Chile is in Spain right now, and they've rolled out the red carpet and tiaras in proper form. Our friend Letizia was all spiffed up for the occasion:

Now, when I saw these pictures, I really couldn't get past the hairdo, but reader Leslie (who clearly has better eyesight and a better attention span than I) emailed to note this: she's wearing a safety pin.

Yes, this is a frequent Letizia move: the safety pin to secure the sash.

Whereas most royal ladies get by with a single brooch to secure their sashes (in the front), Letizia often opts for two: her fleur-de-lis brooch and the safety pin, as you can see above and as you can see if you squint really close in the photo below (the safety pin's on her shoulder):

Of course, on some nights, she only wears one. And what I really don't understand is why she makes it the safety pin.

Especially on nights like tonight, when the sash is so substantial.

To be fair, here's a close up of the pin (or one of them, maybe she has one in silver/platinum as well?). It is indeed bejeweled:

But still. It just makes me wonder if she realizes that from far away, it doesn't appear to be a jewel; it appears to be a sewing box staple. Hmm...

And, because I must, the rest of this evening's look:

As I say, I never got past the hair. Are there hair extensions or pieces involved in there, do you think? That's just a whole lot of hair, right?

Moving on...I adore a full skirt, and I don't mind the little sleeved top either. But maybe an ensemble so simple is better suited to a sash with more interest than this one?

Oh, and also: it's been reported that Letizia has a new tiara (on which her fleur-de-lis brooch is supposed to be the centerpiece). Where is it? Hmm? Clearly she wasn't planning on using the brooch. Are you telling me she doesn't have the same need I do to play with my presents as soon as I receive them?


Photos: Getty/Daylife

Things That Make You Go Hmm...: Letizia's Safety Pin

Let the gala dinners for 2011 begin! The President of Chile is in Spain right now, and they've rolled out the red carpet and tiaras in proper form. Our friend Letizia was all spiffed up for the occasion:

Now, when I saw these pictures, I really couldn't get past the hairdo, but reader Leslie (who clearly has better eyesight and a better attention span than I) emailed to note this: she's wearing a safety pin.

Yes, this is a frequent Letizia move: the safety pin to secure the sash.

Whereas most royal ladies get by with a single brooch to secure their sashes (in the front), Letizia often opts for two: her fleur-de-lis brooch and the safety pin, as you can see above and as you can see if you squint really close in the photo below (the safety pin's on her shoulder):

Of course, on some nights, she only wears one. And what I really don't understand is why she makes it the safety pin.

Especially on nights like tonight, when the sash is so substantial.

To be fair, here's a close up of the pin (or one of them, maybe she has one in silver/platinum as well?). It is indeed bejeweled:

But still. It just makes me wonder if she realizes that from far away, it doesn't appear to be a jewel; it appears to be a sewing box staple. Hmm...

And, because I must, the rest of this evening's look:

As I say, I never got past the hair. Are there hair extensions or pieces involved in there, do you think? That's just a whole lot of hair, right?

Moving on...I adore a full skirt, and I don't mind the little sleeved top either. But maybe an ensemble so simple is better suited to a sash with more interest than this one?

Oh, and also: it's been reported that Letizia has a new tiara (on which her fleur-de-lis brooch is supposed to be the centerpiece). Where is it? Hmm? Clearly she wasn't planning on using the brooch. Are you telling me she doesn't have the same need I do to play with my presents as soon as I receive them?


Photos: Getty/Daylife